Alcohol Repeat

31 10 2008

I as well have found myself drinking more and more to try not to eat. Although I do drink VODKA & WATER so that I do get my water in and it only has 64 cals. add a little lime and it taste pretty good. I was down this morning 1.4 but not to say much cuz i must have been up yesterday. I didn’t weigh.  This week has not been good for me at all I have been yo-yoing back and forth. Sorry no post yesterday work is about to kill me. I don’t seem to have a min to myself right now. So much going on and no time to do it all in. Well I will try to post some more later but for now it is off to work I go again.

Much love, stay strong, starve on,

xoxo S



30 10 2008

I have come to realize that not only am I fat, I am a binge drinker.  Troy told me last night that I just don’t know when to stop.  He tried to categorize me as an alcoholic, but I know I am not.  I explained that I binge drink, or at least I fit that category.  I had one OJ and rum last night, which is very good for me.  Normally I start and can’t stop.  

I totally blew my eating yesterday, I didn’t track at all.  I have been sick with a sinus infection for 2 weeks now.  Yesterday I felt horrible.  I also haven’t been on the scale in 3 days.  Sometimes I wonder if I have enough control to do this.  Food is like a drug for me.  I use it in the wrong ways.  It was my medication for feeling sick yesterday, that is wrong.  If I can just track again I would be fine.  I know that I can do 800 cal or less if I don’t drink, I have done it b4 *LOTS OF TIMES*….It is all the alcohol that is killing me.