Ok so i got to clear the air… YOU MUST READ

28 09 2009

Just so we r clear this site is not meant to pusuade anyone to do any diet that we have talked about on this blog. My only intentions with this site is to share what I have tried and what has worked or not worked for me. I do understand that many of you have issues with the types of diets that have been discussed on this site. For me and many others who read and support this blog it is a way to discuss what we try and what we are feeling with the diets that we try. If you pay any attention to this blog at all that is not the only things that I discuss on here. This is a personal  way for me to clear my mind and get things off my chest. For those of you who find my blog offensive I am sorry for that but you can at any time click off and discontinue reading.  I am a single mother I am a smoker and I am a woman who has many struggles in her life weight being one of many. This is not a pity party for me I do not expect you to feel sorry for me or to understand where I am coming from with all the things that I write about.  To any children who may read this blog DO UNDERSTAND THAT I AM NOT CONDOANING THIS BEHAVIOR OR THIS LIFESTYLE. I DO believe that the best and healthiest way to lose weight is to diet and exercise. Which IS what I have been doing since last posting on this site. It has taken much time but I am now down 32 pounds and feeling wonderful about it. Knowing that I have done it the right way is fullfilling. I do have some help from a diet pill that I take. This pill is however prescribed by a doctor under his supervision. So to all of you who are reading and do read this thank you so much. As for all of my haters I hope that I have cleared things up for you.


31 05 2009

If you haven’t guessed I am NOT doing at all well on the diet issue.  I haven’t even been trying and vacation is two weeks away. So fat and all I am going to go to the beaches of Flordia and not give a damn what anyone thinks. Besides I don’t know those people and it’s not as if I have to see them again.  I don’t have anyone to impress and I think that is a problem for me. There is not a special someone in my life that I try to stay lookin good for. Everyone around me I am so comfortable with that I just don’t care. I know that is not the attitude to have but that is just the way I feel. Yes I know you are suppose to do it for yourself and that is the only way it is successful. Blah, blah, blah. So anyways I am going to hang out and see what happens. By far I want to be thinner but I also want to enjoy life and not have to worry all the time about my weight. It sucks so bad to be heavy but it sucks even more to have to worry about being heavy. Whatever I am going on vaca and I am going to have a damn good time and when I get back maybe just maybe I will do something about it then.

On another note I finally got that new car that I have been wanting forever…. I am so excited about it and I love it.  I got a Kia Soul, yes it is the car with the hampster commercial! 

So that is all that is going on in my life nothing too exciting I know but just thought I would share a few moments with you all. Much love


I’m Back

5 05 2009

Hey guys well if you hadn’t guess things haven’t exactly went the way that I planned around here. The weight loss is not going well but I am at it again and eventually I will make it to my goal weight. I am working out and eating a shit ton of salad and watching my carb intake. I did start taking the Alli diet pill and I am not seeing the effects that everyone says there is .I am however walking 4 miles a day and that is doing me some good. I feel better even though the weight is not coming off like I had hoped. I do however have another dr apt. for this week to find out if something is going on with my thyroid. I have busted my butt and with little result it is hard to keep going but i just keep in mind that I do have a beautiful lil girl to keep going for.

On another note I am having much luck with my business and have gained a good clientel. I am even starting a job working with the residental living center here by my house next Wed. so that is a good thing and I am excited. It will be one day a week and I will take care of the ladies hair there at the center. I got a Pedicure chair now that I am moved into a bigger shop and business is going well with that. I love my new space and the accomplishments that I have made there. Now if I can only get my health issues taken care of I will be set.

With school about to let out I am starting to worry about what to do with my daughter for the summer. She will go to her dads alot of the time but he has to go to work before I will be getting off and now I have to figure out what to do with that in between time. I’m sure that it will all work out and things will be fine. Putting in all these hours will hopefully pay off in the long run.

To all of you who are reading thanks for bearing with me even though I do not get on as often as I would like. I do appreciate the comments and I am sorry for not getting back to you as soon as I should have. Feel free to send me an email at s_treffert@yahoo.com I hope to hear from you and I just want to wish you all the best of luck. Hopefully I will be on sooner this next time. Until then much love to all of you

I Lose and not the weight

18 03 2009

So if you hadn’t figured it out I lost the bet and it has been down hill since then. One weekend with a cheat day turned into a month I swear.  I just can’t seem to get things going like I had hoped. No excuses just plain laziness on my part. As far as my eating goes it has not been too bad but I have not exercised in 2 weeks.  I have felt horrible. Since my surgery my hormones are all out of wack, I don’t feel like exercising, I just want to sleep all the time. My iron is way down and I can’t seem to get it to balance out. Dr says that is probably why I didn’t take the weight off like I had hoped. Whatever! After being defeated I let it go to far, thinking that I would just eat what I wanted that weekend and then I would start all over again. I let the loss get to me and I have been in a downward spiral since then. My moods are crazy. I think I could have a nervous breakdown at any time and since food has always been my comfort guess where I am turning? You got it right to all the foods that I like to think makes me feel better. I know that in the long run I always feel worse about eating them but at the time I don’t think about anything other than eating. I just don’t know what to do. Finances have got me in a tizzy, court date is coming up with the ex, K’s meeting for school is coming up. I just feel overwhelmed right now and I don’t deal well with it. I have never been one to deal well with stress. I worry to much about the little things that when the big things come up I am all stretched out.  I think I am going to see about some ” happy pills” for a while. Even though I know that I should not take them. (known pill popper) that’s another story in itself. So I am going to have to watch that closely but I can’t continue on the way I am. Drinking has picked up and I hate that. I don’t drink in front of my daughter so I stay up drinking and pondering all my thoughts. I can’t speak to the parentals cuz they know nothing about any of it. I am just at my wits end and I don’t know what to do.This is not the first time that I have felt this way it is ongoing but usually I can snap myself back into atleast somewhat normal feelings.  My daughter gets me through most everything. The only difference is I have never had to wonder where the next dollar is going to come from to take care of her. She is my life and I live everyday for her. So now that you know why I haven’t been on please feel free to comment and leave any suggestions that you may have. Much love to you all!

3 More Days

28 02 2009

The clock is ticking and so far I am on track. There are 3 more days to go til the final weigh in with my dad and bro. I am super excited and as of right now I am in first. The biggest downfall is that my dad tends to drop a few in one day and as of now I am only ahead by 1. My goal is to drop atleast to more pounds in the next three days before the weigh in. That will put me at my personal goal to lose 15 pounds in 4 weeks. I am trying to give it my all and hang in there. Not giving into temptation right now is a challenge but I also want to prove that I can shed the weight too. Girl scout cookies come in yesterday and ofcourse I had ordered 4 boxes before this whole thing started. The look on my face when they showed up yesterday I’m sure was discust. I did not want them anywhere near me. I managed to sell 2 of the boxes that I had bought to co-workers. That was a definate plus. Even bigger plus is that I sold MY favorite ones so the temptation is not as great. I kept the boxes that my daughter wanted and I am limiting how many she can have a day as well.  I know that I haven’t been on for a while so here is the scoop. I am now down 13 pounds since the start of all of this, I am back to doing the Weight Watchers because that is what works for me. I am trying to lose it at a resonable pace so that I can keep it off this time. No sence in losing it if it’s not going to stay off. Gym time has been cut short for me the last few weeks so I bought a resistance band and a few other things so that I can atleast get in a few short workouts through out the day. I do take the band to work with me and if I have a chance I try to fit in a little before or after lunch. I am trying to do short intervels either before or after each meal. It seems to be working ok. I know that if I was to go to the gym it would probably be coming off a little faster but what the hell it’s coming off and that is my only concern at this time. I also wear ankle weights to work for a little something. So that is the plan that I am using at this time. You will find that I will try many things through out this journey but I always seem to go back to WW. It just works for me..

On a nother note my daughter is playing basketball and I am enjoying that so much. She really loves the sport and is getting better all the time. This is game number seven and with only one game left she is doing very well. She is starting to come out of her shell. She started out very timid and is now learning to get in there and fight for the ball. She made 2 baskets today and got the defence award. I was so proud of her and she was proud of her self. I love the joy in her eyes when she knows that she has done well. Of course it is a family event to go watch her play and that gives her alot of incouragement. With me and dad, gma and gpa(my parents), great gma, aunt L and uncle S all watching she nows that she has the support I fell a child should have and that means the world to her to know that we all are there for her.

Well that is my journey so far I have had my ups and downs and will have from now on. The only thing that matters is I get up and start again. Much love to all my readers. Wishing you all the best until next time..



13 02 2009

I had my whole day planned out and so far nothing is going as planned. The sinnus/ now upset stomach has go me feelin like shit. I have had a headache the most part of the day that just makes me want to do nothing and to be honest that is about what I have done. I can’t quit coughing which makes the headache worse. I then cough so hard that I feel nausea, I want to eat (everything in sight) but I know that I will puke if I do. I don’t have time for this shit. I am heading into the third week of this bet and things are not lookin good at all. I wanted to go spend some needed time at the gym today but just can’t bring myself to do it. I hope things are better tomorrow. I did manage to get my car vaccuumed and washed today before I go try to trade her in tomorrow. I was suppose to go with my bro tonight to do some shopping(Valentines) for his girlfriend, but her car has broke down and he is now trying to get her out of the middle of the road. She was suppose to be at work and we were going to go then but now I have no idea what is going on. This has just been a day from hell for all of us. Even though my stomach is upset I find myself wanting to eat things that I know I shouldn’t. I think it is a comfort thing. Before I used food to comfort me for everything and that is a hard habit to break. I am a binge eater and for what reason?  I know they don’t really make me feel better but I still look at them and want them. My daughter came home from school today with a bag full of candy. It took everything I have to not look in that bag. I got sent a box of chocolates which I want to open but I know when I do I will eat them all. I am going to take them when I take K to see her cousins this weekend and let the kids devour them. Then I won’t have to look at them anymore.  I have upset the guy that has been trying to talk to me today. He asked me to go out tomorrow and I told him NO. I am just not into him that way and I know that if I go he will think that there is still a chance that we are going to get together even though I have told him were not.I also seen an old boyfriend today and he wants to get together tonight and hang out. I want to hang out with him but I just don’t know if it is a good idea. We had a fallen out a while ago and I am still a little upset about how it went down. He acts like nothing ever happened and everything is fine. Maybe I should just get over it but that is not the only time it has happened. I just don’t know if we are on the same page in life. I kind of feel like the only reason he is asking is because he found out that I was talking to someone else. He is so jelous and we are not even together anymore.  I will probably see him sometime tonight and we will see where things go. I love him with all my heart but I just don’t know what to do anymore. I am tired of all the drama that comes with men. I am a pretty drama free person and that is what seems to come when I am seeing someone.  Why oh why do I even bother. Maybe i should just stay single til my daughter is grown then I can go party and date and all that stuff that I should be doing now. Don’t take that the wrong way I love my daughter and I wouldn’t trade her for anything or anyone in the world. That is most of the problem, I don’t let men around her til I know them very well and I am sure something is going to come out of it. That normally takes a while and most men don’t want to wait. Speaking of men, we seen my ex-husband (K’s dad) driving through town today when he should of been at work. No big deal except he didn’t bother to call her and tell her that he was taking the day off and try to spend some time with her. That really pisses me off. Right now because of his work schedule and her bball schedule she only gets to see her day for about 24 hours every other weekend. He doesn’t have the time to take off for her when I need him to but then to see that he had taken today off for no reason aggravates me. I don’t understand why he has to be that way. He claims to want to spend more time with her but then when he is off he don’t call to try to spend it with her.  Alot of it has to do with his bitch ass g/f (sorry for the language) but that is no excuse. Anyway that is a whole nother story.. Sorry for the rant today just needed to get some of it off my chest for a change.  Much love to all my readers.

Feelin the Burn

13 02 2009

I just got home from the gym and I am feelin great, besides the sinus shit that I can’t seem to kick due to the wonderful weather here in southern IL.  Yeah I admit it I live in IL so what? lol  I got in a 2 hour workout today. Not near enough but hey you got to get what ya can sometimes and that happened to be all I got today.  My daughter was sick again lastnight and today so I delt with that most of the day. When I wasn’t tryin to work. Work was a drag, sick kid, not enough time at the gym, makes for a not so good day. I was just not feelin it today.  I must admit that the only reason I went to the gym is because my (daddy) asked if I was going. I just couldn’t tell him no I am being lazy today and I don’t want to go so I went. Good thing he is watchin out for me or I wouldn’t of went today and there has been other days as well.  I figure if my dad can work out for 2 1/2 hours I should be able to fit in some time too.  I am a big DADDY’S GIRL  and I hate to disappoint him so when I don’t go I feel like I am letting him down as well as my daughter and myself.  My daddy(yes that’s what I call him still) has some health issues that I am sure someday unless I do something about it now are going to be issues of mine too. He has High blood pressure and diabetes( which he has under control and no longer has to take meds).  I want to get my life under control so I can teach my daughter to control hers. I don’t want to leave behind the most important thing in my life before it is my time.  So now is the time to change the bad things that I have taught her and replace them with good ones. 

I haven’t weighed today and don’t plan to weigh tomorrow. I am trying to break myself of the vicious cycle. I am habitual about it and I want to stop. I fluctuate so bad that all it does is frustrate and discourage me so I have got to stop. I do not want this time to be like all the other where I give up because of a pound or two gained.  This is no longer an option for me…  It must be done and done right.

I hope that things are good for you all and hopefully you will get something other than chocolates for V-day…lol